I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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