Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
