It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
