just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
