There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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