I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
