so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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