Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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