We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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