he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
