Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
