am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
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