She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize