ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
