My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Randomize