Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
