I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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