talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize