i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize