yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
