put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
