Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
