U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
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