Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
