i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
