my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
