if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
