Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
