i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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