he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Do you have feelings for this penis?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
