Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
