3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Randomize
