I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
