...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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