You surviving the open bar?
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I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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