i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize