is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Randomize
