so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
