Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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