problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.