hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office