Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
