i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
