Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize