can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
