there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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