you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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