I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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