I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
third nipple confirmed
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
