Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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